Boobs

I thought I had stripper boobs the first time, but oh man, are these things huge. Most women would be thrilled have nice, full breast at least till they realize how incredibly painful they can be. Dexter liked to look at them, but that was all I allowed. They hurt so much I could barely manage a shirt with a shelf bra. Then there is Flip constantly elbowing me. I thought that they might explode. It looked like it too. So the boobs aren’t all that great. They hurt, you get stretch marks, they hurt, you cant find bras big enough, the hurt, you have to deflect water from the shower head, and did I mention they hurt. So the last thing on my mind is what fun the girls will be for Dexter. I usually dress in a separate room from him in fear that he might forget how incredibly painful they are and grab them. The thought makes my eyes tear up.
The doctor told me they would stop being so tender after my first trimester—more LIES. They still hurt; they are still growing, and are off limits to Dexter. Poor Dexter.
I gave up and got my maternity clothes out. But every shirt I tried on would not hold the girls in properly. CRAP! Its no fun shopping for ugly clothes that make you feel even fatter than you already are. Dexter was surprised when I came home a few days one week with shopping bags. What the hell was I supposed to wear, hmm? Besides I don’t pine after poorly made, overpriced maternity clothes. I just had to have something to fit my ever growing boobs and belly in. Then I had a wedding to go to so I had to buy a dress to fit into as well. Dexter actually asked me why I didn’t wear a dress I bought a few months ago…um, maybe because I cannot zip it up! Seriously, he has a degree…
So I have ugly clothes to go over my ugly bra that holds my aching breast that Dexter can’t touch. It just can’t get more fun than that!