Babies are so precious, cute and cuddly. They smile and sleep and sleep and smile. Its grand. For about 18 months you try your hardest to teach them to walk and talk. And then once the thrill and joy of seeing them accomplish this has worn off you spend the next 18 years trying to get them to sit down and be quiet.
With that in mind Mimi, now you need to attempt the next step in parenthood preparation. Its time to get a little serious. Kids often test their parents. I discovered early on I am not made of much. I crumble and cry right along with my little rascals. If you cannot fathom that then try this:
1. Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required).
2. Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years.
3. Play this tape in your house, while you sleep, eat, shower, cook dinner, talk on the phone, watch TV and check emails for the next four years. (Important: one two-hour break is allowed daily to simulate nap time, but if the phone rings or the dog barks before the two-hour break is over then you must immediately start to play the tape again)
You are now ready to spend time with a toddler.
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